Truth or TRUTH - which will you listen to?

   I wont accept it!
   I don't care what the internet, or the doctors or anyone else says. I won't accept it.
   No, I haven't got my head in the sand. I can hear what is being said. I understand the evidence and to the world it may look like the truth.
   But there is truth and TRUTH. There is perceived truth and there is God's TRUTH.
   Let me explain.
   Years ago we listened as a Psychiatrist delivered her prognosis. 'If she survives, she will need counselling every week for the rest of her life. She will likely never marry, drive a car, have a job...'
I tuned out. Yes, this was the truth as the doctors understood it. In other words  they were admitting they couldn't really do anything to cure her. They could try and help her live an existence far short of her potential and her destiny.
   However, several months earlier, a young man of God had given us a higher hope. 'Though the bud be bruised there will be a flower'. This was God's promise. After we left the doctor's office we made a choice. We would not accept the doctor's truth. We understood they would operate through that paradigm, and we would work with them where possible.
   But we would cling to the TRUTH. God had promised a flower. We looked for a flower. We prayed for it, waited for it and focused on it.
   Was the road easy? Did we see an instant miracle? No. But God proved himself to be faithful. We saw a beautiful flower. (You can read all about it the in the book 'Though the Bud be Bruised'.)
   Now I find myself in a similar place. Our granddaughter has now had more anaphylactic episodes than I can count over the past five weeks. Twice on Monday ambulances silenced their sirens outside her home. They stabilised her, and then transferred her to hospital.
   Her problem is fickle. One moment it is threatening to shut off her airways. An hour later she can look fine, as though nothing happened. Six hours later it can rebound for the whole process to be repeated.
   Doctors believe she is allergic to her own hormones. It is like trying to avoid an invisible enemy that lurks constantly within you. Medics are trying to get permission from the Governor General to administer drugs that may or may not help her, but come with nasty side affects.
   However, I have a promise for this battle; a simple promise. "Nothing was missing." Before David was made King, the enemy raided his town and took everything; houses, possessions, wives and children. But he pursued the enemy relentlessly. They marched and fought until they were beyond exhaustion. They recovered everything. Everything.
   And as a vile unseen enemy tries to rob, kill and destroy within our family, we will fight. God has promised me victory with 'Nothing missing.' Everything will be recovered.
   I choose to believe the TRUTH. After all Jesus gave His life so we could walk in victory. To accept anything else would be dishonouring to my God.

Disposing of things that breed in the night.

    Where does it all come from? Does it breed? Do ghosts add to the piles in the middle of the night? And why my place?
    I've seen pictures of other desks that are tidy, clean and attractive. Why is it always my desk that is covered with untidy piles of paper, containers of hand cream, various dead pens, old Christmas cards, shopping vouchers, crumpled receipts... Isn't it my turn to be pristine, to have an office that would look charming in one of those glossy magazines?
    Then it hit me. "This desk could to be faulty. Maybe I need to buy a new one."
    I raised the idea with Steve. He laughed, pointing out that only my side seems to be malfunctioning.
    We share a desk. It is old, antique even, and very large. It is configured with two towers of drawers on each end of the desk top. One set of drawers faces his side, one opens to my side. We sit looking at each other - well we would except I have a very high, wide computer screen that blocks his portion of the desk.
    Walking around my screen, I surveyed his side. It didn't quite fit the glossy magazine image, but it seemed to be functioning much better than my side. That would be right. His part of our joint world is always more ordered.
    Returning to my chair, my shoulders slumped. I considered dropping my head upon my folded arms in the magazine posture of despair. But...there is no room on the desk for my arms.
    Then, in a flash of inspiration, or was it frustration, I understood! The problem is I!
    Sigh!
    Why can't I be more like him? I marched outside and wheeled in the rubbish bin.With the broom I could sweep it all away, and then my desk would be clean.
    But, I couldn't. Everything seemed too valuable. There was the recipe for Peppermint Coconut Bark, the BAS forms, addresses that must be kept, unpaid bills,  invoices to be entered in MYOB, CDs of old sermons, and grand-kid's paintings. There were the sketch drawings for the book I started over a year ago, the character sheets for the one I started last year, the notes on another. The more paper I moved, the more treasures were disclosed.

    After returning the unfed wheelie bin, I sat in my chair and developed a plan. I will deal with a bit each day. I will use the filing cabinet. I will dispose of the eight A4 bound copies of early versions of Though the Bud be Bruised. I will!
    Is the plan working?
    There is definite progress. Now the mouse can move! That's a great help.
    Tonight I found a card. Opening it, I read, "To dearest Jo - writer of wonderful, soul-searching books".
    And I remember. I'm unique, made in His image to do the work that only I can do. I walk to the beat of a creative drum. I'm spontaneous rather than ordered. I enjoy being innovative rather than tidy.
    Now, if I can only find that piece of paper....

Why do we pretend evil doesn't exist?

It is nearly eight weeks since we launched 'Though the Bud be Bruised'. It has travelled far and wide to places and people I guess I will never know. 



For the first few weeks I felt as though I was sitting on the edge of a volcano, wondering if it would erupt. Now I feel a little easier. Mostly reviews and readers alike have been very positive in their comments. 
The book has its controversial places and I know it would have been a very difficult read for many of my friends and family.
However I have been great blessed by many emails, comments and reviews. This story is bringing hope and restoration as well as a challenge to many. I am well pleased. 
I really enjoyed a chance meeting with a friend from the era of the book. She was delighted to have the truth exposed, everything out in the open. Others still don't want to know. I find that many Christians, when confronted with evil, like to hide it, ignore it, or pretend it doesn't exist. We as a family had to deal with wickedness. It invaded our lives in several forms. We were shocked by its presence, but no longer could we pretend it wasn't there. 


My favourite quote from the book is ‘Where evil is protected, evil thrives!’ Why does the church create an environment that covers (and hence incubates) anything unsavoury? Supposedly it is to make us good 'witnesses', so we look good to the world! But it isn't working. The world isn't blind or stupid. While we hide bad behaviour behind a veil of secrecy, they laugh at us and call us hypocrites and worse. Sadly, they are right. Hiding evil isn't displaying God's glory. His glory is shown when evil is exposed, defeated and the situation is restored! Only those who don't understand the mighty power of God to heal, restore and deliver keep the unsavoury in the dark! The world longs to see a power that can defeat their personal demons.
Someone said to me recently. 'I don't like fighting, so I don't participate in spiritual warfare.' My reply? 'You do participate - whether you like it or not. You are in a war and if you don't fight you are permanently defeated.'
Another friend commented on the phone. 'I'm just hanging in there. I'm hoping the devil will give up soon.' 
That won't work. He's never going to stop terrorising us while we don't resist. 


You, I and that lady all have within us the authority to send him packing! If we resist him he will flee. That is the Word of God. But resistance must be active and requires focus, determination and effort. If we really understood why Jesus came we would rush to His feet, in public, as the woman who had suffered from endless vaginal bleeding. She found wholeness, victory and new life. And then we would be able to share this victory with those who fight the ravages of evil every day. 
C'mon church! Rise up and fight! You can do it!

I don't want to talk about it.

   Don't talk about it! I don't want to know! Leave me in my little cage of denial!
People, I find, don't want to hear about the on-going results of serious sexual trauma. 
   As a family, we walked the "Sexual Abuse Road." There is no way back, no sidetrack that avoids the bumps and potholes. We found ourselves on a journey we didn't choose or want, but we had no choice. Like it or lump it, this was our life. From that day on, our family would be classed as dysfunctional. Why? Because we were victims of crime.
   The road was rough, painful and difficult. It challenged everything we believed. Anything that wasn't a deeply embedded part of our lives was shaken off and we were left clinging to the Rock called Jesus.
    So I wrote the book, Though the Bud be Bruised, to share our journey and our victories: to show the amazing grace and healing love of our God who led us, via the wilderness, to wholeness. 
   The book also shares the church's struggle when dealing with such issues, especially when the consequences turn to unpleasant psychological outcomes. The unspoken (occasionally even spoken) judgement  implied that, if we had real faith, none of these things would be happening. As a family we made the church untidy. We marred the squeaky clean image that churches try and maintain to make God look good.
   The church's inability to handle our 'dysfunctional family' and the consequences of the abuse, which was perpetrated within the church, was nearly more painful for me than the crime itself.
   However that was years ago. It is all behind me. God, in His grace, used this disaster to reveal himself to me in a greater measure. I am very thankful for the love He showed me then, and continues to pour out on me to this very day.
   But this week I am angry again!
   I approached a Christian radio station asking for an opportunity to speak about my book. When a lovely lady rang to organise an interview, she back peddled upon hearing the topic was sexual abuse. After she consulted with the program director, I was referred away from the morning program to the News and current affairs. Their email asked why I would write a book about such a heavy topic and difficult subject matter. 
   All contact I've had with these people has been highly professional and very polite but it has stirred up my passion. Isn't it time good Christians stopped shying away from such subjects? Let's face the brutal facts. Sexual abuse has happened and is still happening within the church. And not only within those of traditional persuasion. It is equally embedded in 'alive' churches. One in four women and a lower percentage of men who sit in our churches have been victims of sexual abuse. One in four of the girls in our Sunday schools are or will be a victim.
   Ignorance of these facts made our family easy pickings for the enemy. I want parents to be better informed. My aim is to educate them of the dangers, and so expose the evil ways of the enemy. Let's shine a light of truth in the dark.
   Paedophilia is alive and well in churches. Today. Now! How can that be? Because where evil isn't challenged, it thrives! Where there is a discomfort around a topic, we can be sure it is active but camouflaged in our midst. The enemy loves to hide under a veil of false holiness and feigned humility. He is safe there, as long as no one is well enough informed  to recognise him and so expose him.

   Jesus walked amongst those who lived on the seamier side of life. He talked to the woman caught in adultery, called the thief down from the tree, spoke directly to the outcast woman who had been bleeding for years,and sat in the cemetery talking to the madman. Everyone was acceptable to Him, except the pious and hard-hearted religious leaders.
   Is there anyone out there who will open the doors with me and expose the wickedness that is hidden in the darkness of false piety?

What a Celebration! What a Victory!

   What a fabulous night! We launched 'Though the Bud be Bruised' with fun and fanfare. This picture pretty much summarises the night. Everything Pink and Black and beautiful - but a few details fell sideways!
   Did that matter? No!
   In the background of this pictures you can see the books covered, waiting. We didn't open the boxes until the program was complete. Then we put a book in every hand, so they could touch, feel, and read. Then we trusted them to either pay or return the book.
    Did the party reach my expectations? I had three aims. I wanted...

•  everyone to enjoy themselves
•  the participants to leave as excited advocates for my book 
•  God's victory to be evident.

The room was full. There were about 200 people who were enthusiastic and excited. I've had lots of comments about the detail - the roses bruised on the path as people walked in, the petals which are still covering the front floor of my church, the pink and black food served by my wonderful grandchildren and the roses everywhere.

    Steve made a powerful opening speech, honouring God and encouraging men to read the book. My amazing guest speaker, Wendy Francis, Qld CEO of Australian Christian Lobby, put aside her own causes to quote from the book and talk about it. I was honoured by her words and encouragement.

  I took the opportunity to thank my friends, Dawn and Sue who have put so much effort into the book with advice and editing. I was very pleased to have my publisher,Rochelle, to share and delighted she sold many books written by other Australian authors.

    We gave everyone a lucky petal and drew a couple of prizes. It was just a fun night.
   So I return to the question - Was it successful. God was honoured, people did have fun and many books were sold.
I wait now to see if I have generated excited advocates. Only time will tell, but I do know of one friend that has two copies out on loan, another who intends giving it to the leaders of their children's ministry, another who says he'll be using it in evangelism! Yes I'm encouraged. But I'm excited when someone reads it and then has to 'pray about just so many things'.

 It was more than a book launch! We celebrated a great victory.


The evil that was designed to destroy us and our family has been turned completely around. It has been exposed in this book of victory. May many others find victory through the pages of 'Though the Bud be Bruised.'

   

  
   

My book leaves home

    As my book begins to be more widely distributed, I find myself watching,wondering and waiting. What do they think? Are they reading it or is it gathering dust? Do they think I'm crazy?
    Having never published a book before, I'm surprised by this stage. Although 'Though the Bud be Bruised' isn't officially released until 1st June, there are several copies now being read by close friends and reviewers.
   The problem is I know where each book is, and I keep wondering...and watching for feedback.
    But I had a revelation! My book has left home! I will always be its author, but it must now make its own way in the big wide world. It will succeed or fail on its own merit. It is now in the public domain and must accept the people's judgement.
    Like any good parent I have done my best. I have prepared it for the world, encouraged it to be true to itself; to carry its message with pride and determination rather than aim to join the popular crowd. I have drummed into it the importance of accuracy and simplicity and helped it chose truth over convention.
    It is never easy to release a child into the world, to sever the apron strings and allow them to succeed or fail on their own merit. Every parent wants to hover, to ensure that the child makes the best choices, works hard and drives safely. But the time comes when you must wave them good-bye, close the door, release them to God's care and protection and live your own life in peace.

    So it is with 'Though the Bud be Bruised.' It is finished. I must release it to do its work. Oh, yes! I'll still talk about it, promote it and do my best to help it travel far and wide. I will rejoice in its success and contend with its opponents. But with God's help I won't worry about it any longer. As Pilate said, 'I have written what I have written!'

Preparing for a Book Launch!

   
This week has been a lot of fun as I prepare for the party to celebrate the release of my book, 'Though the Bud be Bruised.' Replies to the invitations are filtering in. Food is organised and the drinks are stowed ready. Everything follows the colour theme as established set by the book cover and so I've been chasing down a variety of things from black serviettes to pink balloons.
    On the way I've made a few exciting discoveries, little things that seem to there waiting for me to find them! I was shopping with Julie, my friend and party consultant yesterday. (She has an eye for the extraordinary that can turn a room into a sensation!) We were shopping in a popular candle store looking for pink tea-lights when she spies a beautiful candle. It was crafted in the shape of a rose and just happened to be the same colour as the rose on the cover of the book. Excited, she is planning where to use them. I am cautious. I'm sure they will be expensive. But wait! They are on sale as they were Mother's day stock, so now reduced to $5 each. We get five of them. But when they go through the cash register they have been reduced again. Now only $2. I grab more of them. 
    We leave the shop feeling the favour of the Lord. I'm sure he's going ahead of me to organise things. Farewelling Julie, I walk into the next shop and find a great skirt to wear. And guess what? It has roses on the black lace. The shop assistant asks about the book launch and takes a card so she can order a book from Amazon.
    From there I go next door. There I find a black top that has lace sleeves with...you guessed it...roses in the lace. I grab that, thankful for the sale price and bring it all home to try with the pink scarf I bought last week. Together it looks great. Oh and did I tell you that the scarf came with a pendant - a large moulded rose.
    All these little things remind me that God is always leading and guiding me. I feel safe in the hollow of his hand. It gives me confidence the book has been written at right time.

The labour pains are beginning

When the nine months is up a woman has no choice - she must bring her baby into the world. Although I've never given birth, I've assisted at the births of six beautiful babies so I understand some of the struggle required to produce a strong, healthy, noisy baby.



But now I'm facing my first birth. Well it feels like that to me. In six weeks my baby is due to be born. I know it is a girl and she is already named. Though the Bud be Bruised will be released on 2nd  June with much fan fare and fun. The question that exercises my mind is this. Will this baby book survive? Will she grow to be strong or will she be a one day wonder and fade away?


And so I labour with everything that is within me to bring forth the full potential of what God has planted. Today we have the 'show' - the first tangible evidence that the birth in eminent. Yes, my publisher has a few copies of the book. On Saturday, I'll hold a copy in my hand. It's very exciting, but, I remind myself,  it is just a bundle of paper. The real book won't be born until it is in readers hands and flowing into their hearts. The real book is the message of hope and love that awaits to leap off the pages.


What if she is still born, if the books land on bedside tables and overstuffed book shelves, gathering dust rather than inspiring minds? What if the book doesn't cry out to be read? What if it is opened and then discarded and forgotten?

I have done everything I can do throughout the two year gestation period to bring forth a strong, healthy specimen. In the inner places, the story was formed to honour God and inspire others to know Him, to love Him and to walk in faith. It was crafted to be an enjoying, compelling read.  But now as the labour begins, the reality will soon be exposed. 

How I work over the next few months will effect the size and scope of the impact of this powerful little book. And like any mother in the birthing suite, I need support people. I need ambassadors, reviewers, gossipers, and friends. Anyone that can tell others about the book. People who can open doors far and wide until this book is in such demand that Koorong will be asking for stock, libraries will be ordering it, and I'll be invited to speak all over Australia.


So get ready! I'll put everything I have into pushing this book as far as I can across the nations. All I ask is that you get a copy, read it and recommend it to others. Pre orders are open, but I'm yet to get payment methods finalised. 

Fiction - a valid form of teaching?

My young friend was so shocked I thought his face was going to drop off his head. He has been eagerly awaiting the release of my book. The other day I told him that the book was a fiction. His disappointment was clear.
'But...but I've never read a fiction.' Between his words I could hear, 'I've never wasted my time on such trivial things. I'm a serious student of the Word.'
Trying to recover, he continued. 'I guess I could try and read a fiction.' He sounded doubtful.
'Jesus talked fiction.' I waited for the idea to sink in. 'The Bible refers to His stories as parables.'
As I've preached in the last months, my young friend has heard me refer to my book . He is expecting good solid teaching. He won't be disappointed. The teaching is there, but it is encapsulated in story, drama, struggles and real life, instead of clearly articulated points, lists and carefully referenced theology. 
Jesus used both forms of communication to teach his followers, disciples and dissenters. But it is the stories that are remembered, repeated and pondered over. We have taught our children basic life principles using stories like 'The boy who cried Wolf,' so why has fiction been pushed into a genre that is considered lesser literature than a non-fiction book. Consider 'Anne of Green Gables', 'Oliver,' 'The Lord of the Rings' and 'Brave Heart'. The stories remain part of us, long after the book is shut or the movie closes. Scenes return to our minds at unexpected times. They lead us and guide us.
That is my prayer for 'Though the Bud be Bruised.' May the story remain in the readers mind and bring wisdom, understanding and a deeper love of God, as the months and years pass. May it bring hope of healing to those in pain and clarity to those who are confused. These are big expectations, but I have a big God. He asked me to write the book and I have, presenting it as well as I could. Now I release it to Him. I have written it on paper. It is His role to write it on readers hearts.